Danny O'Shea Has No Interest In The Penn State Job

Little Giants pee-wee football coach Danny O'Shea has turned down Penn State's offer to become the next football coach at Happy Valley to stay in Urbania, Ohio.

"After years of running the three yards and cloud of dust offense," O'Shea says. "I just didn't feel like Penn State was ready for The Annexation of Puerto Rico." 

O'Shea is the 60th coach to turn down the Penn State job to replace the legendary Joe Paterno. None of the coaches interviewed are interested in rebuilding the smoldering mess left by the Jerry Sandusky scandal.

"Penn State is just not the ideal situation for me," said O'Shea. "I hear North Korea has a opening that is much more interesting to my family and I. They're ready for The Annexation of Puerto Rico."

Penn State will move on. The next coach expected to be interviewed will be Coach Klein of South Central Louisiana State University. Bobby Boucher has graduated and rumors are Coach Klein is looking for a bigger contract.