The Joe Morgan Drinking Game

I'll be honest, I haven't watched ESPN Sunday Night Baseball in a long time. When I was a kid, I loved Sunday Night Baseball. It was the perfect way to end the weekend and begin a new work week. Over the years though I quit watching Sunday Night Baseball. I quit watching Sunday Night Baseball for a variety of reasons which included I grew up and started watching other shows like 60 Minutes and Mad Men. I also quit watching because Joe Morgan became irritating over time.

When I was younger, Joe Morgan was really cool. He used to host a Celebrity Golf Tournament each year in a suburb of Sacramento each summer. My uncle would get tickets because he worked for Coors and Coors was a sponsor of the tournament. I remember standing at a tee box receiving autographs from Jim McMahon, Jim Brown, Mario Lemieux, Carlton Fisk, and Rollie Fingers. I remember specifically Johnny Bench refusing to sign my baseball because he said, "I can't sign baseball's because of my contract." Needless to say Johnny Bench is a dick. Eventually though the golf tournament went away and Joe Morgan became more irritating/rattle/annoy me and the rest of the baseball fans. Hell there was a website created called Fire Joe Morgan. So I'm not alone.

Last night though I couldn't avoid Joe Morgan or Sunday Night Baseball. My Giants were playing their rival Dodgers. The Giants are surging right now and were on the verge of the sweep. So last night's game was particular interesting to me. Needless to say I didn't avoid Joe for the first three innings of last night's game before finally grabbing my radio and listening to Duane Kuiper, Mike Krukow, and Dave Flemming.



After watching the first three innings of Morgan, I decided to create the official KSJ Joe Morgan Drinking Game. Now I know this has been done before, so I'm going to create the rules based on what I listened to last night*.

*Warning: When playing the Joe Morgan Drinking Game, drink beer only. You might end up dead trying to drink hard alcohol during a Sunday Night game. 

One Drink
- When Joe brags about his correct picks. (Last night he bragged about picking the Giants to win the NL West)
- Whenever Joe uses the word "consistent."
- Every time Joe bristles when Jon or Orel bring up Sabermetics stats. 
- When Joe starts talking percentages.
- When Joe makes no sense at all.

Two Drinks
- When Joe compares a current player to a Hall of Fame player like Willie Mays.
- When Joe mentions that the batter is "waiting for a good pitch to hit."
- When Joe mispronounces a team/city name or a player's name.
- When Joe guesses what pitch was just thrown.

Three Drinks
- Whenever there is a West Coast and Joe mentions the shadows on the field.
- When Joe says, "Oh, that was an easy play."
- When Joe mixes up two players. 

Chug
- When you ask yourself, "Is Joe Morgan even paying attention to the game?"
- When you ask yourself, "Has Joe Morgan done any research on these two teams?"
- When you debate whether or not you rather listen to Buck and McCarver over Morgan.

Drink Champagne
- Whenever Joe makes fun of Tommy Lasorda. (For Giants fans only)

And to think, all this happened in one game. Imagine watching every Sunday Night game? 

Disclaimer: Must be 21 years or older to participate in the Joe Morgan Drinking Game.