November 4, 2013

Talkin' Sports: The Mess in Miami & More

49er16: Did you see this bizarre story out of Miami? I've just know heard about it because I've been gone for a few days in the mountains. Anyways, this story reminds me of that one episode of The Sopranos when Chris gets mad for having to pay for all the guys meals and him and Paul get in an argument and then kill the waiter over a tip.

The Colonel: Haha when I read that report about the vets making the rookies pay for expensive meals that's also the first thing I thought of was that episode of The Sopranos. I half expect Jonathon Martin to throw a brick at Richie Incognito.

49er16: How big of dick is that guy? Not only do opposing players hate his guts but now even his own teammates hate this guy. I bet he was the guy in school who bullied weaker kids, then got beat up by one of his victims, and never bullied another kid again. Except no one has beat up this guy yet.

The Colonel: My question is how are the Dolphins suppose to handle a player vs. player situation? "Okay boys stop being so mean to each other. I mean it." And how awkward is the position the players union is in having to defend Incognito?

49er16: I love when these unions protect even the scumbags. "Yeah Aaron Hernandez might have killed a couple of guys but we're fighting for his bonus to set an example and not give these teams any ideas like withholding money from future possible murderers."

The Colonel: How lucky are the Seahawks and Chiefs? Those two teams should go to Vegas together and shut down a casino. I could definitely see Andy Reid at a buffet and Carroll at Circus Circus.

49er16: Russell Wilson showing his ID to those over-zealous casino security guards. I could definitely see it. Kansas City is going to have one of those games where their defense gives up like 25 points and the offense won't be able to respond. And it's coming when they play Denver. We know Alex Smith and we know he can't comeback from a deficit.

The Colonel: Oh it will be glorious when Kansas City makes it to the playoffs and Alex Smith can't complete a third down in a playoff game. We've seen that Chiefs team before, they played in San Francisco in 2011.

49er16: Between Gary Kubiak collapsing on the field yesterday, John Fox having heart problems and having to miss a few games, to Jim Harbaugh having heart problems himself is it worth it coaching in the NFL? Coaches have just as bad time with their health as the players.

The Colonel: I can't even imagine how insane it must be to coach an NFL team. Not only do coaches have health problems but Tony Dungy and Andy Reid have lost sons and kept moving almost like nothing happened. I can't image the pressure these guys must face.

49er16: And it seems like it never ends. You hear about NBA and MLB coaches taking some time off during the offseason. Hell we've seen clips of Bochy fishing off the Florida Keys. Have you ever seen a feature on an NFL coach fishing in Mexico or vacationing in Montana? No, you haven't.

The Colonel: Could you imagine a NFL coach doing crazy March Madness stuff like dressing up like Ron Burgundy like Bill Self did? Could you imagine how horrified Jason Garrett would be if you asked him to do a skit like that?

49er16: You see this report that Harold Reynolds is the frontrunner to replace McCarver on the Fox broadcasts. Reynolds might be the most MLB/Fox hire ever.

The Colonel: If there's something these broadcast networks like for their MLB coverage, it's analysts who are bland and have never formed their own opinion or just spout cliches. And God don't even mention criticism to them because they (specifically Reynolds) would never criticize a player who makes a bad play.

49er16: I never thought much of Reynolds until I saw him on the MLB Network's coverage of the draft. Woof he was bad.

The Colonel: Too bad there isn't an intern for him to hug to get him fired.

49er16: Have a good week, folks.


  1. If this year's version of the Silver and Black had an offense beyond whatever Terrelle Pryor does each week, KC probably has a L right now. On the other hand, if Riley Cooper > D.J. Hayden, the Eagles don't drop almost half a hundred yesterday either. #toosoon

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