August 9, 2012

Talkin' Baseball: Get Off Clint's Baseball Field

(Note: The Colonel and I had an emergency Talkin' Baseball since this trailer for a baseball movie involving Clint Eastwood Debuted yesterday.)
 

49er16: Man Clint Eastwood went from co-staring with Lee Van Cleef to Justin Timberlake. What a fall.

The Colonel: I love how Eastwood went from cranky old man with an old car to cranky old man on a baseball field. Good God I hope he calls Amy Adams a "broad" or a "dame" during that movie. It would be too perfect.

49er16: "HEY BROAD GET OFF OF MY BASEBALL FIELD! NO GURLS ALLOWED!"

The Colonel: "THERE'S NO CRYING, TAMPONS, OR BETTY CROCKER HERE MISSY. NOW BEAT IT BEFORE I WHIP YOUR ASS."


49er16: Did you see that Heyman report that the Dodgers really wanted Cliff Lee and would take on his contract? ALL THE BAD CONTRACTS TO THE DODGERS!

The Colonel: I like this report that the Dodgers ownership group doesn't even have the money to really buy the Dodgers and that they're counting on a TV contract to pay for the deal. So basically they're the McCourts but only there's a group of them with Magic Johnson.

49er16: I also like how the Angels have all these pitchers they've gutted their farm system for and are still fighting the A's and the Orioles for the a Wild Card spot. Southern California baseball is the very best.

The Colonel: So when do the Orioles fire Showalter and then win the world series the next season? Two years from now?

49er16: Right after Bundy comes up and Wieters and Jones hit their prime the rest of the pitchers on the staff grow up a little more. And it would be awesome if Rick Dempsey replaced Buck and then was fired himself a couple of years later.

The Colonel: Dempsey always struck me as a player who got a lot of tail while he was playing. I bet him and Palmer were having threesomes up and down the Maryland seaboard.

49er16: And since Earl Weaver was their manager and Weaver only played for the bomb, the women they were slaying all had to be 10's.

The Colonel: Oh definitely. No Philly skanks like our guy Pat the Bat Burrell. Just the finest tail for Palmer and Dempsey's stache.

49er16: I posted this video yesterday about the Cleveland Indians. It's funny and depressing at the same time watching it.

The Colonel: I like how the Indians the past couple of years are like every other teenage boy who had sex for the first time. They come rumbling out the gates only to stumble on their faces pretty quickly.

49er16: Can you believe the Giants are 2nd in the majors with runs scored on the road? But still a middle of the pack team in terms of runs scored during the season because they don't score at home. Unbelievable.

The Colonel: Well that will certainly feed into the KNBR callers who believe "the fences should be moved in at AT&T Park".

49er16: "YEAH GARY THE FENCES SHOULD BE MOVED IN! THE GIANTS CAN'T SCORE RUNS WHEN THE FENCES ARE AT THE EDGE OF THE BAY!"

The Colonel: "AND WHILE THE FENCES ARE BEING MOVED IN, WILL THE GIANTS PLEASE RELEASE THAT LOSER BELT? BRETT PILL IS TEN TIMES THE HITTER THAN HE IS. REMEMBER MO VAUGHN?"

49er16: "HEY GARY! THE 1980 HOCKEY TEAM SUCKED! NO ONE ON THAT TEAM SUCCEEDED IN THE NHL! YEAH SURE KEN MORROW WON 4 STRAIGHT CHAMPIONSHIPS WITH THE NEW YORK ISLANDERS BUT THE REST OF THE PLAYERS SUCKED! USSR! USSR!"

(Note: The conversation above about the 1980 USA hockey team really happened yesterday on KNBR.)

2 comments:

  1. Thank You for the image of this guy having threesomes with Jim Palmer: http://parkwaypastimes.com/uploads/images/Orioles%20Picture%20042.jpg

    Though I'm guessing Palmer wasn't exactly needing a second guy to come help him out.

    The best NHL player off the Miracle on Ice team was probably Neal Broten.

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