Deciphering Baseball Language

According to dictionary.com 'Deciphering' means, "to make out the meaning of (poor or partially obliterated writing, etc.): to decipher a hastily scribbled note." Which is a perfect definition of deciphering baseball language. 

For whatever reason baseball players, announcers, and occasionally writers speak in varying cliche language. Sure players from other sports will talk in cliche, but they're not as bad as baseball players. Baseball players have a language all to themselves. 

This time of the year when teams begin reporting to spring training you'll start hearing that player x is in "the best shape of his life". What does all this baseball language exactly mean? Luckily I have deciphered some of the baseball language you'll commonly hear throughout the year.

"Best shape of his life" 
Example: Aubrey Huff is in the best shape of his life.
Actual Meaning: Player x was in horrendous shape last year because he didn't work out in the offseason. So when the next spring training comes along players, announcers, and writers noticed that players has dropped a few pounds and all of a sudden he's in the best shape of his life. Pablo Sandoval has been in the best shape of his life for the past 5 spring trainings.

"Gritty" 
Example: David Eckstein sure is gritty.
Actual Meaning: "Gritty" has replaced "hustle" because "hustle" was always associated with Pete Rose and people don't want to associate a player kicked out of the game for gambling with someone as wholesome as David Eckstein. The truth is that players labeled as "gritty"usually sucks. David Eckstein couldn't hit for power but boy was he sure gritty. Look at that little guy run the bases. Every team needs a David Eckstein. If you have a player on your team that is associated with the word "gritty" that means he sucks.

"He looked good in the batting cage." 
Example: Aaron Rowand looked good in the batting cage.
Actual Meaning: We're into the Mike Krukow section of the baseball language. One of Krukow's favorite sayings is that "player x looked good in the batting cages." When you decipher that language it tells you that looking good in the batting cage doesn't mean that player is going to look good against Roy Halladay. And almost anytime Krukow says a player looked good in the batting cage usually that player will go 0-for-4 with two strikeouts.

"This guy can hit." 
Example: Matt Cain can hit.
Actual Meaning: Another Krukow special. Krukow is a former pitcher and he believes almost all pitchers are good hitters. Hence saying pitcher x "can hit." In reality most pitchers can't hit or shouldn't even be given a wooden bat (See Dan Runzler against Milwaukee in 2010).

"This guy is a pie-thrower." 
Example: Tony Campana is a pie-thrower
Actual Meaning: Last season Mike Krukow kept saying Chicago Cubs outfielder Tony Campana was a "pie-thrower". After watching Campana throw the only definition for "pie-thrower" is, this guy's arm is like a wet noodle. He can barely throw the ball back to the infield.

"He knows how to pitch" 
Example: Dave Dravecky knows how to pitch
Actual Meaning: It took me a while to decipher this saying, until I figured out it's a back-handed compliment to the rest of a pitching staff. Former Giants manager Roger Craig used to say, "Dave Dravecky knows how to pitch." Wasn't until now that I realized Craig was basically saying Dravecky is the best pitcher I have and the rest of the crew is mediocre.